We dine out looking for the ambiance, better cooking and of-course good service. The occasional escape from the homemade meals to (if you choose right) the fancy and expensive buffet at our favourite restaurants, cafés and kafundas (Hot Joints). It could be a lunch date, dinner or just a weekend out to sit at that cozy corner and read a book or write something creative.

The meal price tag on the menu comes with expectations. If I’m going to pay a steep price for a meal, I expect Good Food + Ambiance and most importantly SERVICE. The cheaper the meals the more lax I am about everything. I’m hungry and I just want to eat and move on.

THE PROBLEM

a.The Order or Leave policy

In Uganda, most uptown restaurant or cafe owners spend millions to create a cozy and comfortable environment for the guests. From cozy furniture to trendy stylistic interior decor meant to convince customers that the food is good here (often not). This is a strategy for recruiting new clients and hopefully retaining them, but on one condition, order for at least a drink or Leave.

This is common practice and a sort of ‘unsaid rule’ that most locals like myself are aware of. You can’t enter a restaurant and sit, work on your laptop or read a book for more than 30 minutes without having ordered something. The minimum requirement is a bottle of water or soda. Otherwise, one of the waiter/tress will approach you and with all intentions try to get you to order. Here are some of those polite reminders proffered to ‘idle’ customers.

• As a standard, the server will bring to you a menu the moment you sit down. In other countries customers wait to be seated but it’s different here, you can walk in and find a seat of your liking. No fuss needed. So this is when the subtle but determined signals begin. If the waiter has brought a menu to you and you don’t order immediately, they will know that you are not a ‘usual’ frequent customer; those know what they eat. So the waiter will stand by as you peruse through the cardboard menu (printed and designed with internet food pictures), critically scanning your face or at other times nonchalant and bored (already tired of their job and want to yell at you to order so they can move on). If you seem lost for choice, they will make a few suggestions, usually Matooke and chicken or all food and meat. The top billers first. Not beans or vegetables soups. In other-words, make up your mind or let us help you do it.
• If you are genuinely not ready and need more time to read through the menu, then naturally you will ask the waiter to give you some more time, ‘I will call for you when I’m ready’. The server will smile and walk away with one last profiling scan of you. Weighing your probable class and intention. If in more than 10 minutes, you have not ordered, then they will return, having made up their mind that you are either broke or one of those idle customers looking to hang out and take selfies then leave. (The judging can get real and tough) Next step is to offer you a drink as you read the menu. ‘Can I bring you water or Soda?’ they will ask. This is I think a boot camp training trick for Ugandan servers. A safe-guard alternative to have you order something incase you indeed just looking to sit without eating.
• When the carrot fails, it’s sticks out! ‘My boss says you have to order or leave’ A waitress has said this to me once I and my best friend were taking a bit of time to order since what she wanted was not available that day. The servers will either get aggressive with you or make up scenarios of how their superiors will make them pay if a customer they are waiting on sits for longer than 30 minutes without ordering something off the menu. I am not sure if this is indeed true or not but there is surely smoke under that pot.

b. We serve based on race and status

I came to learn from my non-Ugandan acquaintances that they had been to the same restaurants and Cafés, sat for hours on their laptops and books without ordering a single bloody water or soda. Got done and left without spending a coin. This too is another unspoken custom understood by restaurant servers in Uganda. However, there are places that have no selective service.

Majority of Ugandans are polite and not quick to make a scene when there is poor service and I guess this why it is difficult for servers to approach non-Ugandans on the same issue or the fact that guests are given special treatment. But should it be like that? I don’t think so.

CONCLUSION

Restaurant owners defend the observance of the ‘Order or leave’ unwritten rule with the need for security against hooligans and business reasons. A very understandable explaining if this custom is applied to all customers, but it’s not. Otherwise it groups itself under the segregational mentality and prejudice against people of different backgrounds. Public spaces have to be welcoming to anyone, regardless of race, tribe or appearance. To restaurants that run this covert ugly behaviour, customers will quietly leave your business. Make the decent choice of welcoming every customer and if these are the rules for your establishment, then no one should be an exception.

ABOUT ME:

I’m a God fearing Ugandan writer, film producer and artist working in the Ugandan media industry for over the last ten years now and am thankful for the experience, the people I’ve met and the modest living I’ve earned along the way. Thank you for reading this blog. You’re a unicorn. So continue being awesome and kindly share with a friend, leave a comment and subscribe to keep in the know of what I write weekly every Friday! See you next time. Stay Kind.

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